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Tuesday, June 16, 2009

To Be…Know Your Name

Last night was the kick off for our 6-week long Chillville at church. It’s where the woman get together for fellowship, fun, and to hear a great lesson.

It was an eye-opener. We talked about what is in a name. There meanings and even nicknames.  We were asked several questions, like if we liked our names. How they make us feel? If we could change our name what would we change it to and why?

The analogy was an eclipse. The sun was being blocked from it’s true identity and that is the way a lot of Christians live their lives. The dark spot represented Satan. He is the one that makes you start believing lies about who you are.

Have you ever been called a name that you didn’t like? Did it make you not feel good enough? Like a bad mom/dad? Like you are just not worth it?

I didn’t remember this last night, but while I was up early this morning working in the garden, I had time to reflect on last night.

One of my husband’s shift managers, now assistant, always calls me wife #2. It’s not really a nick name per se, but a title. Well, I started to feel like I was and it put doubts in my head.

Whenever I needed him, he had to work. On a few occasions while he was home, she would call and say she was having a bad night at the store and he would go running. He is always her night in shining armor, just to find out she was playing and got behind. I usually wouldn’t see him again that night. So, after a while I did see myself as the 2nd wife.

I’m not insinuating that he would ever cheat, so let me nip that in the bud before I say this. He did tell me that if he was 20 years younger and single she would be the type of girl he would go after.

That didn’t make me feel good. Not smart on his part. It was just another reason for me to feel insecure.

Well, I just roll with it. She still calls me wife #2 and sometimes I even refer to myself as just that when I am speaking to her. I don’t like it. I’m her boss’ wife and she needs to respect me as that, but if it doesn’t bother my husband I’m not going to say anything.  She is a nice girl and I like her.

Speaking of that, there was another young lady that called my husband, “Bookie.” That bothered me, too. I’ve heard her say it in front of me. It just sounded awfully personal for a employee employer relationship.

I’ve never reacted because it’s just a name, a word. I didn’t want to sound immature for bringing it up.

Do you remember saying on the school playground, “sticks and stones may break my bones, but names/words will never hurt me.”

I learned last night that that is not a very accurate statement. It has a deep impact on who you are as a person.

I won’t be able to make Chillville for the next two sessions, but it is broadcasted live on June 22 and 29, from 7-9 pm. Then again on July 13, 20, and 27th. This is and ongoing series and I will update my thoughts for all the ones that I get to join. If you would like to join us yourself you can log on at http://www.gracefellowshipchurch.com, during the above times.

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